Hey giiiiiirrrrrrrl. I’ve been meaning to write. Things are a bit scary as I happen to be stuck in a prison cell because I was attempting to smuggle drugs back into the country and this letter is the only one I have time to write.These people don’t even have email! Can you believe that? So the story goes like this: I read about this totally rad idea on this italian pulp fan forum that I could totally do this thing without any chance of ever getting caught and make LOADS of cash at the time. And to be quite honest I’ve been pretty poor recently so this sounded like a great idea. I’ve only been able to eat these snickers bars my mom sent to me last easter.
Sooooooooooo it all started with this girl whose online name was: jarvislovegirl. She sounds totally rad right!?! I mean, I like jarvis cocker, and you like jarvis cocker, so for her to be a “jarvis love girl” is totally new and original too!
She suggested that I talk to enrico this ex-boyfriend of hers whom she used to go to these BRITPOP parties with. She didn’t like him much because he said once that he didn’t know any songs other than that band that sounds like the Beatles. He was a real looooooooooser in my book because, like, I mean, how could he not have ever heard of Pulp? Everyone’s heard of Pulp. She said that he was pretty loaded and had good blow so he could totally be trusted though. I was such an idiot!
Crap!!!!!!!!!!!t There was an explosion and the lights are now flickering. The last time this happen I had to fight off someone with this pen. I have to go. I’ll write again soon! By the way can you send me that those 5 pounds I spotted you for a drink 3 years ago? I could really use it.
THNX LOVE YA!
this post is part of the “letters from your old britpop friend series”